CHOICE 4: You’re just going to let the gray grow in. Yourself.

This is the option I chose, and I was lucky. I didn’t think I looked all that bad, although I had about three shades going on at any given time, and my colorist wondered how I could even go out on the street like that. It didn’t bother me, I was just completely fascinated by the whole process. Once the “blonde” ends were gone (yes, I finally cut it all off), people started saying, “If my gray hair would come in like yours, I’d do it.” Well, you never know unless you try.

You might have to consider yourself a “work in progress” for a while. If your hair is blonde, or a paler brown, it may not be that noticeable. Occasionally, if you're feeling a bit blah and colorless, you can use a water soluble rinse, like Roux Fanciful, to blend and brighten. (It has a Cinderella-effect of rinsing right out.) But, sooner or later, you must stop coloring it.

Constance Hartnett, former color director for Frédéric Fekkai, and gray herself since the age of 25, advises leaving well enough alone. If a woman opts for a semi-permanent rinse while going through the growing in phase, she warns “You can only do it once. A semi-permanent rinse stains the hair, and it's not going to come off, no matter what the box says.”

“Just wait,” she advises. “If you can stand the idea of short hair, it won't be long.”

In the meantime, if you’ve decided to let your gray hair come in, but aren’t happy with the way you look, there are special effects you can try. Refer to “Choice 3: Going Gray with the help of professionals,” and watch for upcoming features on Great Grays who have used highlighting, lowlighting, clarifying, glazing, and area coloring to make their gray the best it can be.

Remember – going gray is not anti-color. There are lots of ways to boost it, brighten it, highlight it. If your hair is just a blah shade of gray, why settle for it? You may be just a shade away from a gray that goes well with your skintone, adds oomph to your appearance, and makes you look years younger. Talk to your stylist or colorist.