Carol Anne colored around a pretty silvery streak, pre-transitioning, 2007.
Transitioning begins June 2008, and by July, she’s cut her hair 3 inches, and refused to bleach it. Has a “bit of skunkiness” going on.
October ’08. Days after “horrible yellow highlights.” And Catwoman emerges.
Highlights grow out, as the “streak” gets wider. . .
And wider…
And wider! By April, her true color came back, with just a hint of the highlights.
Carol’s transitioning story takes a few bends in the road, as she’s tried to juggle curls, length, and color. She’s gone back and forth a few times, not sure she could stick with it, but an allergic reaction to tattoo dye finally made the commitment for her. Carol’s very curly locks and super long length make this an interesting transition indeed. I’ll let her tell you about it in her own words.
I am 41 years old. I started to see the first signs of gray at the age of 29, and started to color my hair at the age of 30..
I did color washes at first and I always tried to stay true to my natural hair color (brown with some auburn.) Since 2005, I have been coloring my hair almost every two weeks, working my coloring routine around vacations, events, etc. What a hassle. In 2006, I went to a salon and finally got highlights hoping I could camouflage my gray roots and prolong the time between coloring my roots. This worked for a while but then I realized I had to go to the salon to keep up with the highlights. I wanted to go back to my home routine. I also noticed my highlights now had a tint of green. Uh oh. So I called a girlfriend of mine to “fix” it. She is a hairdresser but not a color specialist, and when she was done, my hair was almost black. I was shocked, but kind of liked it. Hubby loved it and I eventually got used to it.
In January 2008 I got my third tattoo, and had a horrible allergic reaction. My ankle had red itchy bumps around the tattoo for a month. In June 2008, just before a vacation, I colored my hair and again had a horrible allergic reaction. This time my hands, feet and face itched on the inside of me. I took antihistamines for many days.
When we returned from vacation the first thing I felt I had to do before going back to work was color my hair. Oh please not again. I had been thinking about letting my hair go natural and got a few consultations from different salons. They all expressed their opinions against it. What to do? Thank goodness I found this website. Without it I would not have had the courage, even though I knew it was something I wanted to do.
I thought someone “tangible”, people other than my cyber sisters on this fantastic website, must be on the same page as me. So, in July ‘08, I went to a “professional,” an Italian man who oozed charm, but not about my gray hair! He insisted my peers would not support me and they would shun me for looking years older. He suggested coloring my hair 2 shades lighter and cutting it. I probably needed a trim, so I let him cut. About three inches! I didn’t let him lighten my hair because the bleach could have damaged it (and probably make my curls go limp.)
In October 2008, I went to another salon and had them put in some highlights to help blend in my roots. Talk about looking like cat woman. Those highlights were like limp spaghetti noodles. I tried not to think about it. I trimmed my hair once a month about 1/2 an inch each time to try to keep it healthy because it kept breaking off. Since then I have cut out most of the yellow highlights.
Honestly, I did not realize how long this would take. It has been almost 17 months since I last colored my hair and I do not want to cut it short. In some spots I still have about 7 - 8 inches of dark, and I estimate this transition will take me one more year. BUT, I have come this far and I will not stop now. Until about two months ago, I still had reservations and my self-confidence wavered. I am sure my husband and friends were getting sick of my nagging and probably trying their best to avoid me and my questions. “Am I doing the right thing”? “Does my hair look ok”? “Do I look older”? “Should I wait another 10 years”? But I always thought how dreadful it would be to have to color every 2 weeks, AND what about allergic reactions?.
And by September, her length was back, with long, cascading curls.
My hair is still about 4 inches shorter than when I started this transition but now I am mostly concerned about getting it healthy again and then letting it grow, grow, grow.
Ed. note: Stay tuned, because Carol Anne’s not done yet!
Carol Anne says Cheers to her new grays in August ’09. . .
And now faces a decision about length, breaking ends,
and doing the best for her hair.
Carol Anne your hair is fabulous. Congratulations on making the decision and well done on having such patience. I went very short early on in the process but had I seen photos like yours I may have kept the length while growing out the dye. I think your hair is stunning, really beautiful and I will be coming to you for curly hair tips 
Posted by on 11/01 at 03:24 PM
Hi Carol Anne, what a wonderful story! I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and I am looking forward to seeing the final outcome. Curls Rule!! 
Posted by on 11/01 at 05:05 PM
Love your curls and your natural color. Very chic! Thanks for sharing your story. I, too, can’t wait to see the final outcome.
Posted by on 11/01 at 06:32 PM
Patience is a virtue you have figured out!!! your hair is beautiful and DON’T get sucked into the “looking older” stuff...no way no how ...even from a charming Italian!!!
Welcome aboard the silver train!!
Posted by on 11/02 at 06:07 AM
Wow Carol Anne. You hair looks beautiful. I can only imagine the courage it has taken to get your hair to this point without cutting it. It is going to be stunning when you are finished.
Posted by on 11/02 at 06:15 AM
Carol Anne , you are beautiful, and so is your hair! The curls are fantastic, don’t listen to anyone that tries to advise you to put any more ‘chemicals’ on it!
Posted by on 11/02 at 07:52 AM
Carol Anne, your hair is gorgeous, it looks amazing. Much better than the dark!
Posted by on 11/02 at 07:58 AM
Wow, Carol Anne!! Absolutely stunningly beautiful! And those curls are so gorgeous, you lucky lady! It’s hard for me to believe now, but I too had those curls before my hair color changed! It was so curly that I hated it on humid days. Now, mine is straight and doesn’t hold a curl very well at all. I’m really hoping for at least some wave once it gets longer. Congrats to you for being patient and keeping your length. I for one was too impatient. I’m amazed that you don’t appear to have any orangey ends at all. That’s what made me chop, those dreaded orangey ends. Again, lucky you!
Posted by on 11/02 at 08:15 AM
Wow ladies, so many nice compliments. Thank all you so much.
Sharon, I must tell you that I have been following you and your hair from short to the latest picture. Just gorgeous. I think you look so fantastic!!
Aziza, did you go very short when you knew you were starting your transition? Why do you think your hair is not as curly? I am always curious as to why or how hair can change like that. My sister used to have pin straight hair, now at 44, she has very wavy hair. Hopefully your curls will come back, that is if you want them. Oh yes, I know about humid days and frizziness, ugh. I love the color of your hair. Bright and beautiful.
Yes, lulubell, it took me a long while to believe that my “curls rule”. However, as I am sure you may know, they are very difficult to tame. I was definitely more afraid of short hair than my natural gray hair. Who cared how silly I looked as “catwomen”.
But each and every one of you encouraged me to keep going. THANK YOU ALL!!!
Posted by on 11/02 at 10:25 AM
Carol Anne~ When I started my transition my hair was about halfway down my back. I initially cut it to my shoulders. I would cut a couple of inches every so often but then I had a mishap with a product called Malibu Demineralizing Treatment. I live in an area that has a lot of iron in the water and I thought maybe that was one of the reasons why I was experiencing so much orange in my hair. (I’m sure a large part of what I was experiencing was just the oxidization that comes from not dyeing anymore.) I was told by the company that this product would help to take some of the minerals out of my hair. Whether this was true or not remains to be seen. Anyway, I used the product and the results were disasterous. This was the week before last Christmas. I went to the salon and had my gal do her magic, which helped somewhat. But,end result was that I ended up doing a major chop without going down to the wood, since I had some good growth before doing the treatment, but much shorter than I was comfortable with. I really think that if I had not used the demineralizer I would have left my length and waited out the process. As for why my hair isn’t curly now? I’m really not sure. I do know that it turned white very early but because I was dyeing it I had no idea how much white there was until I grew it out. It used to hold whatever style I put into it. Over the most recent years I found that it just wouldn’t hold a curl very well anymore. I can only attribute that to the color change. I used to pretty much be a wash and wear gal,and just put a little product in to define the curls. And yes, I would be thrilled to have my curly hair back. It was great to have the curl and be able to let it go or straighten it depending on my mood. But, I do have to say that humid days don’t seem to make my hair frizzy anymore. My hair just doesn’t hold the style as well, it just kind of droops now. I am curious as to why the texture has changed also.
Posted by on 11/02 at 11:19 AM
BTW, thanks for the compliment.
Posted by on 11/02 at 11:35 AM
Carol A. you are absolutely stunning!!! Your hair is so gorgeous!!! Your beautiful eyes, cheekbones...and I LOVE the shap of your eyebrows!!!
Like, Aziza, I have experienced a loss of curls since going natural, as my length increases, I see some curl coming back to life, but only underneath, the top layer is stick straight. Sometimes I think it’s because i use so much less product on my hair now for fear of turning it yellow...but all-in-all, i can’t deny that the curl has deminished.
So keep rockin’ those curls...they look awesome!!
~dede
Posted by on 11/02 at 12:53 PM
I just have to say, wow, what hair! Never fear. You ARE doing the right thing. Your silver curls are going to be your new, gorgeous trademark!
Posted by on 11/02 at 02:48 PM
I have to agree.....talk about signature style! Wow!
Posted by on 11/02 at 03:29 PM
Carol ... I loved seeing these pics of you. I already said it when I saw your member pic but seeing the larger pics really drives it home. You are drop dead gorgeous. I cannot believe the difference I see when I look at the pics with the silver around your face. It gives you a glow like nobody’s business! I am also 41 and although not as strikingly gray as you I am happy to be included in this group of women who have decided to go against what we have been told beauty “should” be. I love your curls and everything about your hair. It even looks cool and edgy in the pics where you have many shades. You are living proof that gray is gorgeous! Looking forward to what’s next for you. Thanks for sharing!
Posted by on 11/02 at 04:02 PM
Carol your hair is beautiful! I too was concerned about cutting the length and have resisted it beyond layers to release my curl too. It seems to me that my hair is curlier than it has ever been - maybe it is the layers.
You are doing the right thing and I had noticed your member pic and am so glad you have a story!
Posted by on 11/02 at 05:13 PM
Wow Carol! You are such an inspiration to us curly girls! Beautiful!
Posted by on 11/02 at 07:19 PM
Ahh, finally Carol Anne, we get to SEE you! As I scrolled through the member’s album I would pause at your picture. I’d get up close & try to see your face & hair, but to no avail, it was too small a picture.
Every woman has a story. Every woman has within her grasp the ability to inspire. Thank you Carol Anne for sharing yours. It is a beautiful journey already.
Posted by on 11/03 at 07:34 AM
Stay the course, Carol Anne! Looking forward to see how you handle the length! You might give me some ideas.
Your hair is so unique and beautiful.
I, too, kept my length while letting the silvers grow in. Lots on top layers of white, but not so many underneath. And also three distinct skunk stripes through the years.
You are gorgeous!
Barbara
Posted by on 11/03 at 09:35 AM
Wow...your hair is beautiful. I wish I had those curls. How do you take care of them?
Posted by on 11/03 at 03:02 PM
Thank you all so much for your continued inspiration and support. How could we get through the glum days without each other!! I truly appreciate each and everyones support.
Barbara-I can see your beautiful silvers. I know your hair will look more glam as the silvers grow longer. Hang in there. It is tough when our hair is so long AND so dark that the contrast can be sooooooo obvious. One thing that kept me going was the big picture. Knowing, in the end when all the black would be gone it will be what I’ve imagined all along.
Cailan, Thank you. How do I take care of my curls? Ugh, it used to be so easy because I would just put tons of leave in conditioner in my hair, but now my hair seems to break off so easily on the ends. My hair is definitely much shorter now than it was 17 months ago. Someone mentioned oxidization. The ends seem drier now that I have stopped coloring. I now (more than before) switch between using coconut oil and Phytonectar at night. My hair can handle me leaving these products overnight and rinsing out in the morning. In the morning I put in a leave in conditioner and while my hair is still wet, I comb it. Then I pat it dry and use Matrix Gelee or Aubry B5 Design Gel. I usually let it air dry and use a bit of hair spray. No combing when it is dry.
Scorpioanne, I have been searching for a picture of you. I want to see your beautiful curls. Yes, I agree about cutting curly hair. One reason I don’t want to cut my hair into layers is because I know from past horrible haircuts, they make my hair fuller. Have you read “Curlygirl”? (don’t remember the author), but that book was my life saver about 10 years ago. Great advice, and LOTS of pictures. Some hairstylists don’t know how to cut our hair and the results can be devastating. Longer layers are best.
Take care everyone!! 
Posted by on 11/03 at 04:02 PM
Hi Carol A.,
I just re-looked at your pictures. Your curls are the best! Is your hair cut in layers around your face?
Yup, no combing or messing around with dry hair! Mine goes from kinda nice waves to not nice, gigantic frizz. Ah! My hair has ‘sploded so don’t sit behind me in a theater or you’ll miss the show!
Thanks for the book info.
Barbara
Posted by on 11/03 at 11:05 PM
Hi Carol A.,
I loved your story and think you are absolutely beautiful, such a wonderful and dramatic change in your looks, and you have those great eyes and stunning curls so many would trade you for...it must have been tough but you did it, and now there’s no turning back…
I too have moments of doubt, but feel so lucky and healthy not to be putting color on my hair every few weeks, like you were doing…
My route - shaving my head and starting over - was intense but much easier and quicker to transition...I love all the photos and that you documented it so well.
This website is fabulous for all of us!
All the best,
Shira
Posted by on 11/04 at 11:20 AM
Carol A.
you are a wonderful role model. I felt that I had to cut because my hair/colored hair turned so orange. Having enjoyed short hair for several months now and lots of compliments for the “real” color of my hair, I am just about determined to “grow”! I loved curls before and see no reason not to love them after! Thanks for the inspiration. You are truly beautiful! Love your curls and your new color. Who knew? Curls are just as appealing in SILVER!!!!
Posted by on 11/04 at 05:04 PM
Carol,
Your hair is absolutely beautiful! I too am a curly girl currently transitioning to silver and find your story very inspiring at a time when I am feeling insecure with two different hair colors going on. Thank you for sharing your journey!
Posted by on 11/04 at 09:10 PM
Wow, wow, wow!!! Carol both you and your hair are truly stunning! your natural silver is so much prettier and just shimmers around your face like a halo. Well done for sticking with the length, I took the easier route of chopping to transition and i’m now all done (just need to update my piccies!) I started in May 09 and had the last of the black colour chopped off 2 weeks ago, so a quick transition! Next comes the growing, that will take far longer. I love my silver, and so it seems does everyone else, I’ve had so many compliments, more than I had for my hair when I coloured.
You have a very strong and stricking look, and that just gets more so with the silver, good luck with the rest of the transition, I cant wait to see the end result!! 
Silverchic/Julia summer 09
Posted by on 11/05 at 03:08 AM
Carol, you look wonderful. I too was a curly girl, but took a very short cut, literally to getting rid of the awful ‘granny beige’ I had become. I am still loving my short pixie look at the moment - but I do find myself wondering what my curls would look like now I am white. Now that is something that scares me because I am worried that because I am so white, it will look overpowering - hey who knows. Thanks for sharing your inspirational story - you really do look terrific. I am sure your hair will become stronger and stronger as you lose the colour from the ends. You really are a very beautiful lady.
Posted by on 11/05 at 12:39 PM
WOW so jealous. Your hair is incredible. I struggle with what I believe is thinner hair.It is tough. Then I see yours WOW.
Truly beautiful
Katie
Posted by on 11/05 at 04:33 PM
This fellow curly girl salutes you- you are stunning!
Posted by on 11/05 at 10:46 PM
You have a beautiful, beautiful, bright and shiny silver. Gorgeous.
Jane xx
Posted by on 11/06 at 12:52 AM
Good Lord, Carol Ann...you look so incredibly gorgeous with that silver...wow, leaves me a little speechless, but just wanted you to know!
Posted by on 11/06 at 08:50 AM
Carol Ann, you and your hair are so beautiful! I’m really quite envious. Amazing!
Posted by on 11/07 at 01:30 PM
Carol Ann I LOVE your hair. You will be a great role model for women with curly long hair who want to go gray, but are afraid. You look beautiful.
Posted by on 11/08 at 05:19 AM
Wow, this was JUST what I needed to see today! Your hair is truly GORGEOUS!!!
From a fellow curlyhead, I’ve been doing the trim every month as the ends are freakin orange! I started all of this in April 2009, and I can tell this is going to take a LONG time.
But after seeing your pictures, I’m thinking of just letting it grow for awhile. I miss my long curls!!! (though I do notice a totally different texture with them!)
Anyway, just wanted to say you look simply amazing....and you give me hope!
Terri
Posted by on 11/10 at 03:04 PM
Thank you so much to everyone for wonderful compliments and continued encouragement. I truly appreciate every single one of them!!!
Tania777, thank you for saying I give you hope. That is exactly what I wanted to do. When I started this almost 18 months ago, I never realized how long this journey would take. Silly me, I never wrote on these pages while going through most of my transition. I did, however, look at this website almost everyday to help keep me going. I should have realized back then how much better I would feel with communicating to all these wonderful ladies. I am sure I would have had less doubts. There were many days I was a bit depressed and thought about giving up and going back to coloring. I did have a bad allergic reaction the last time I colored, but I also had the “big picture” in my head. Only recently do I truly feel it is all worth it. I was at an Esthetics trade show in Fort Lauderdale last weekend and I really couldn’t believe all the compliments I got on my hair, even though it is three toned. I too have orange ends, still. I cut about 1/4 inch every month. My hair breaks off at the ends but I know the “silver” is much healthier. I too cannot wait for my hair to be longer, but for now I guess it is the waiting game.
I have searched for your picture, but cannot find one. How long is your hair? Did you cut much off? I would love to see. Hang in there!! I know it is hard, but it will be worth it. All my best. Carol
Posted by on 11/10 at 08:49 PM
Carol A.,
I think that having the big picture in your head is what makes the transition doable.
Hey, three tones is where it’s at.
Barbara
Posted by on 11/10 at 11:33 PM
Carol Anne,
So, how did your cruise go? Did you have a great time? Just curious as that cruise sounds like something my music loving husband would really enjoy.
Suzanne
Posted by on 12/02 at 07:56 AM
I too have the 3 tones to my hair. I wonder sometimes if it will ever be more “one” shaded. I am glad that I have this website to go to for emotional support. Some days are better than others about how I feel about myself. I can always count on a pick me up from my husband - I hope that everyone has someone like that!! Hope all have a great Friday and wonderful weekend.
Posted by on 12/03 at 02:31 PM
Hi grayincali!! Yes, the cruise was sooooo much fun. So many “80’s Hair Metal” bands. At least two shows every day plus games like “Rock n Roll Jeopardy”, “Battle of the Bands Family Feud, “Guitar Hero”, and “Heavy Metal Speed Dating”, (which I did not participate in). Plus we stopped in Jamaica and the Grand Caymans. We also saw some of the people we knew from a previous similar cruise two years ago. There was also an 80’s prom night. Oh, you should have seen the outfits. I can’t believe we actually wore those get ups. Ugh. But soo much fun to see.
We purchased this cruise in November 08. I can’t believe more than a year has passed. Time does go too quickly. Another one is suppose to happen in January 2011. I am on board for that one when the tickets go on sale. No word yet who or exactly when.
What kind of music does your husband like? Would you go on a Rock n Roll Cruise? Maybe the Silver Sisters should do a cruise or weekend getaway. I know Diana tried to get something going in NY over the summer but it didn’t work out. Although some did get together for Luncheon on the Hudson. I also saw the recent Socal Silver Sisters get together you had. You look spectacular!! All the girls look great!! Did you have a good time. Shame it is so far from me, (I am on the east coast in Florida). Someday we will all get to meet each other in person.
Thanks for writing, so nice to hear from you. All my best to you and your family. Happy Holidays!! Carol Anne.
Posted by on 12/03 at 06:51 PM
Hi grayme,
Yes, it is wonderful to have a supporting husband in all of this. Funny how so many people would ask (not so much now), “What does your husband say”? I worried about that a little, but not as much as I worried about what “strangers” would think. Maybe because you just know you are there to support each other. How can you explain to people that a relationship is so much more than what my “better half” LOOKS LIKE!! Can people be so shallow. Yes, unfortunately.
I am glad you have a supporting husband. He sees you for YOU!!!
This is definitely not an easy task. I never really knew how LONG this journey would take. Oh, I thought it would be over by now. I am going on my 18th month. WHAT? I probably still have at least 6 more to go. Yes, my hair is a million different colors. It looks horrible to others, but to me, I can’t believe the progress. Now that I have come this far and can see some results, I am so happy. I cannot wait for the black to be gone, but hey, patience is a virtue. I know I could cut off the black and just let it grow, but I find the longer my hair is, no matter what color, the more comfortable I am. It is a security blanket for me I guess. I still have my bad days and wonder if I am doing the right thing. Lately I have been getting more compliments though. So hang in there because people will see what you see.
It may sound silly but when I “wanted” to start this process I had some reservations because I thought I was too young and what would people think? But when my allergic reactions got worse, I really didn’t have a choice. “Mother Nature” made the decision for me. I am so glad she did.
All my best, Carol Anne
Posted by on 12/03 at 07:25 PM
Carol A. Thanks for the response - Have a great weekend!
Posted by on 12/04 at 06:13 AM
Oh my gosh, that cruise sounds like a kick in the pants! Love the 80’s prom idea ... yes, I graduated in ‘86 so my dress would have fit right in! My husband would be a pro at the rock ‘n roll jeopardy. He’s been told many times he should do a show like that. As for his musical taste he likes just about everything ... except country. He loves classic rock and progressive music and is a musician himself (keyboards, percussion). I can’t say we’re huge fans of the 80s hair bands but they are big in the fun factor department! Oh, I must admit I used to love Rat and Whitesnake, Loverboy, etc. I showed my husband the website shortly after you posted that you were going. I just love the concept! Awesome!
Well, glad to hear you had a great time and that everyone noticed your beautiful hair. It’s nice not to care what other people think, but still very nice to get the ego boost when people notice how nice you look!
Take care and have a great weekend!
Posted by on 12/04 at 07:31 AM
Glad that you had a great time on your cruise, Carol A! 80s prom night? What a blast!
I know everyone feels differently about their transitioning and what other people may think about it. But, in my opinion, in the big picture of things, it really doesn’t matter what anyone thinks except you. It’s your decision about your hair. Period.
Having gone through many, many years of getting to where I am today, I can only say that as bizarre as my hair looked for lots of them, it was what I wanted. I was happy to know that my husband supported my decision. It was great that my husband understood that it was what I wanted for me.
Just got three comments about my hair yesterday which was a rare occurrence. Two positives from strangers and one about how “peculiar” my white pattern is, and “why is it like that?” as if there’s something wrong with it/me. Both were from my Mother.
Can’t please all the people all the time, but who cares?!
Carol A., you have stunning and unique hair! Anyone thinking your hair is anything else is envious!
Happy weekend,
Barbara
PS Loverboy? Rat?
Posted by on 12/04 at 04:10 PM
grayincali, funny… I do like all kinds of music too, except country. LOL. Have a great Sunday!!!
Barbara, thank you for you kind words. I am glad you got some great compliments. Your hair is long and thick and beautiful. Anyone would be jealous!!! Your gray streak is definitely unique.
My mother doesn’t have great compliments about my “gray” either. When I first started this she thought I was being “foolish”. She was quite frank that I was too young and it doesn’t suit me. I had mixed feelings about her opinions. But if your mother doesn’t tell you the truth about what she thinks, who will. For that I am grateful because I cherish her opinion.
Even though I was a bit depressed with her initial reaction, I did not let it sway me with MY opinion. Again, I saw the end result in my head. I sometimes wonder if my mom doesn’t want to see her “little girl” go gray because that just means to her that time keeps going and she is no longer as young as she once was. Her “baby” is now 42. How could that make her feel? But I think she is coming around. I have convinced her that it does not bother me like she may think it would. I have shown her this website several times. She cannot deny the women are beautiful!!!
Have a happy Sunday. Carol Anne
Posted by on 12/05 at 05:05 PM
Hi Carol Anne,
You’re very welcome. I say it like I see it. Your hair is stunning, dramatic and exotic.
The positive comments I got were good to hear. I heard more reactions, mostly positive, when my hair was in its bizarre stage. I look back at pictures of the tri-colored stage and cringe. I recently found a few that are beyond words except to say that I’ve never seen so much sickly orange on one head. I wish I had them at the time I submitted pictures for my story. Maybe I still can.
The exception to this is that I do care and respect what gals have to say here. I don’t consider them strangers, but rather the opposite.
I understand that your decision to go natural makes your mom think about her own aging and perhaps mortality.
My kid sister is 48 and has the most silky, shiny silver hair when it grows out. But as a new mother, she doesn’t want to be mistaken for her son’s grandma. I can’t imagine that happening since she is very youthful and vibrant.
Silver or colored, it’s all about attitude.
I’m glad that your mother is coming around. Seeing all of the beautiful silver sisters is inspiring. My mother got distracted when I tried to show her the website - even my story. It’s pretty insulting, but that’s just the way she is.
Do I have the middle child syndrome? Probably.
Have you recovered from your cruise?
Barbara
Posted by on 12/08 at 08:52 PM
Hi Barbara,
Have I recovered from my cruise? I suppose yes. I am still resonating though, and cannot wait for the next one. I have made some pretty cool friends from around the world. We all keep in touch and share stories and pictures through the internet. Truly amazing.
Look at what the internet created here with us ladies. We are all spread apart but on the same journey. We are all here to support each other and give encouragement. How many of us could not have persevered without each other, even though we have never met in person.
I hope your sister and mother will come around eventually. I still look at pictures almost every day on this website and can’t believe how much better everyone looks with their natural hair. So much more light in the faces. I can’t see “older” in any one of us. Just more vibrant and unique.
I always love to look at pictures, so if you find the “bizarre, tri-color” stage ones, let’s have a look. Maybe Diana’s next project could be of those pictures of us. Who is game? Diana, shall we send in those “I can’t believe I walked around in public with that multi-colored hair” pictures? I know I am still in that stage and can definitely contribute. BUT, who cares!! I know in the end it will be worth it. I am 18 months into it now. It was truly hard at first, but now it just gets easier and my reservations have dimmed.
Nice to hear from you Barbara!! Take good care, Carol Anne
Posted by on 12/09 at 05:51 PM
Carole Ann, your lovely white hair goes beautifully with your eyes and skin tones. My hair is fine, curly and thick when it’s gray and oddly enough straight when it’s colored. Don’t know why.
Anyway, I love my gray curly (or perhaps it’s just wavy) hair. We should accept ourselves as we are and not try to change the beautiful hair that nature has given us. Your silvery hair is lovely Hope you never go back to the dye
Posted by on 12/23 at 03:37 PM
Dear Carol Anne,
I stumbled upon this website...one I could have used a couple of years ago. During that time, I finally let my hair go natural for one year! I hadn’t seen it’s real color for at least 20 years. How sad. I regret not seeing it gradually change....I truly love the silver and I have a lot especially on top. Well to make a long story shorter, I dyed it dark again and am at square one, once again.After seeing you, I want to really do it this time. It’s like an addiction the haircoloring thing, you know. You hesitated at times, but what we really need is support. You will always want to go natural....you’re not like the others who will dye until they die.... I saw your progression and the last pic is truly beautiful. Your hair looks so healthy and the color now pops your eye color right out! I can relate well to you,too, because my hair is very curly like yours and I always strive to get it as long as possible. I understand you not wanting to cut out the dark...then there goes your length. I understand the spring up philosophy regarding long curly hair. It takes forever to show length even though the hair is quite long....when wet! Keep going and send more pics. You look fabulous. By the way, I’m 46, soon to be 47. Thanks for the inspiration/validation.
Posted by on 12/31 at 03:28 PM
Hello Carol Anne - loved your pics and story! You are totally stunning mixed with exotic! Thank you for sharing!
Cisami09 (Newbie 10)
Posted by on 01/05 at 09:57 AM
Hi Carol Anne, You look F A B U L O U S, very chic, daring and exotic. You’ve done it well
Posted by on 01/07 at 05:54 AM
Hi ladies,
Hope everyone had wonderful holidays. I had a house full of guests for one month (yes), so forgive me if I have not been keeping up with blogging.
Mari,annyo63, Cisami09 and “Dare” lene, I can’t thank you enough for the kind words and encouragement. Still sometimes have the blahs about my hair, but you all truly keep me going. I just looked at a few photos my sister posted on her facebook and I must admit I cringed a bit when I saw some of me. Oh well, I knew I could count on my “Silver Sisters” to make me feel better!!
annyo63, so glad you understand about why I am afraid to cut my hair so short. Yes, the “spring up” philosophy can be annoying. I feel it is so short now, I cannot imagine cutting off any more. I know it would be much healthier if I did. Maybe in a month or two when the gray has grown a little longer. What about you? Are you going to stop coloring now? I would love to see pictures? Are you on the newbies pages? Believe me, the first year for me was hard in many ways. I was very depressed at times because I kept thinking “how old is this making me look”?, “maybe I should just wait 10 more years”, I avoided getting my picture taken, didn’t want to make eye contact with people, etc.. I am now in my 20th month and I feel much better about the transitioning process. I definitely get more compliments on my hair now. My self confidence is “almost” back to where it was when I was coloring. When my hair is rid of all the black and back to the length I want it to be (way past my shoulders), my self confidence will be 100% restored. Funny but it is not the gray that is bothering me, (I love the gray), it is the fact that I lost so much length through this whole process. I hope this can give a bit of encouragement to you and others!! Best of luck.
Posted by on 01/17 at 10:11 AM
carol a...i hear you loud and clear with the “cringe” reaction to SOME pics ... but since i hate having my picture taken i find i “cringe” anyway!!!
you look great trust your pals here....
Posted by on 01/18 at 03:51 PM
Hi Carole Ann: Your thick, curly, silvery hair is absolutely stunning, dramatic, and unique. Not only do you not look older with gray hair, I think you actually look a little younger because white is a softer look thank dark brown or black. Please hang in there and don’t color your hair...dyed hair can look harsh and brassy, but your silvery main is just GORGEOUS! Happy growing..your hair will be long before you know it all the best, Mari
Posted by on 01/19 at 02:32 PM
Mari, thanks for your compliments, ESPECIALLY for saying you think I look a little younger. I used to ask my friends, hubby, family “do you think I look older” ALL THE TIME in the beginning. I don’t ask anymore (I am sure they are grateful for that). Maybe I am just used to my color now or/and am finally comfortable with it. I know the “black” was very harsh and fake on me. I like the gray now, especially all the different “highlights”. Here’s to having patience. Ugh!!! 20 months and counting. 
Posted by on 01/19 at 06:35 PM
Hi Carol A.,
Yes I’m a Newbie ‘10 and in the member’s album. Thanks for the note. I’ve not colored since December and will not color again. This is a definite.I totally understand why you love the length. I may only get some more long layers in but the length stays. I don’t know about you but not too many hairstylists do curly hair well. I’ve had many bad experiences and they always take too much off. Then I get an afro look. I’ve been trimming my hair by myself for now. I love the gray and having fun with conversing with all of you. With the curls and gray it really looks cool. Coloring would be a huge mistake. You are the way you SHOULD be now. Nice to meet you.... 
Posted by on 01/20 at 10:31 AM
Hi Carole Ann: First of all, I’d like to say that you’re the same age as my son who will be 42 years old this year. I think that if I had had a daughter, she might look something like you.
Your hair is still quite long and lovely. I have to tell you that unfortunately, in August, I bowed to peer pressure and colored my hair...and it gave me the worst allergic reaction of my life.(Ended up in the emergency room).
I’ve had to cut my hair short-short and start all over again. At least now, I’m back to completely natural hair again, despite the short length. I’d give anything to still have the long curly hair that I had before, but I know that it will grow back, and in another year, it will be long again. But that said, please take my advice, and don’t color your hair. I believe that you also said something about allergic reactions to hair dye. You are almost there. Please don’t end up like me, with pixie length hair because you listened to other people who didn’t know what they were talking about.
Hang in and be patient. You’re almost there. All the best, Mari
Posted by on 01/21 at 12:15 PM
annyo63, you are so right. Why is it they always want to chop off the curls? I have been cutting my own hair for over 18 years. Last year when I went for a “consultation”, the hairdresser first suggested to cut off 3 inches. Needless to say, since then, my hair has been breaking off on it’s own (not so much lately), and now that I lost alot of lenght, I feel like an 80’s stepchild. I never liked my own hair “puffy”. But, I am used to it now I guess and from here, it only gets longer. Hang in there!!! When the gray grows in your hair will be more beautiful than it is now.
Posted by on 01/22 at 07:06 PM
Mari, such nice compliments. Thank you so much. Your words are truly encouraging!! They do keep me going.
I am so sorry you had to go to the emergency room. Did you have allergic reactions before? Did you have any specific reason you stopped coloring the first time?
Have a good weekend!!
Posted by on 01/22 at 07:13 PM
Hi Carole Anne: I have always had a slight problem with allergies to hair color, but it got really bad after I had some permenant makeup done. Actually, it turned out that the makeup is a form of tatoo, and that tatoos can cause allergic reactions to worsen. From now on, I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT ever color my hair again...but why would I want to when actually, I get more complements with my silvery hair than with the colored hair...you too, huh? Because, If I’m not mistaken, you are what is known as a Winter (like me) and Winters gray better than any other season. I’ve been going back and forth with the “to dye or not to dye” issue for about the last ten years, (indiscisive, like a true Libra, haha But now, I’ve made peace with my hair.
All the best, Mari
Posted by on 01/23 at 12:46 PM
Thanks for the encouragement Carole Anne. I did get a great cut from a hairdresser when my hair was about 6” gray on top. It was long layers. The only problem was that, in order to maintain it, I had to blowdry it and purchace a Paul Mitchell hair iron. Kept that high maintainance up until the summer.....when whatever I did, turned my hair to frizz with the humidity here in Massachusetts. Thus, the puffy, 80’s look(ha, ha) like you said. The style was great( one I had never had....those irons were never around) for someone with straight hair. Trying now to keep my hair healthy and as natural as possible.The iron is not good for healthy hair....again, my distrust of the hairstyling industry. See a lot of women with really fried , dull hair walking around. You see, without the dye...our hair will be great. I don’t see too many people with curly long grays(except Carole King, a little long), so it’s definitely cool. Can’t wait to see your finished product, silver sister 
.
Posted by on 01/23 at 03:33 PM
Carol Anne:
Gorgeous!!! Striking!!! Outstanding!!! Magnificent!!! Need I saw more? Look people in the eye with confidence knowing how beautiful you look. Your gray looks fantastic, chic, “cool,” etc. Keep on growing. You are an inspiration.
Posted by on 01/23 at 07:06 PM
Hi all,
I ditto your comments about Carol A.’s gorgeous looks.
Barbara
Posted by on 01/23 at 08:46 PM
Keep up the good work Carol Anne, your hair is looking so beautiful
Posted by on 01/25 at 04:45 AM
Mari, I think I have also always been sensitive to dye but just didn’t reallize it until I got my third tattoo. My ankle was swollen with red bumps for weeks. After that , I was even more sensitive when coloring my hair. Like you, I have made peace with my hair. I suppose I don’t really have a choice. I mean at least I know I can never color it again because of alergies. Regardless of that, if I “fell off the wagon” I am sure I would truly regret it. This has been one EXTREMELY LONG process, and I really don’t want to go through it again. 20 months and counting. I am happy with the color and CANNOT wait for all the dye to be gone!!!
Take care. (where can I find your picture?)
Posted by on 01/26 at 12:41 PM
annyo63, What a process to straighten those beautiful curls!!! I would love to see some pictures with your straight hair and 6 inches of silver. I have had mine blown out 3 times in my life. It always took at least two hours before done.
My hair breaking off has been so frustrating for me. Did your hair break off too? I do keep trimming it but cannot bring myself to get a “CHOP”. There are things I have done, like getting highlights, cutting the front, etc...that I regret, but I got through it. I have learned now to just leave my hair alone, do deep conditions once a week and be patient. Eventually it will be back to the length where I want it.....someday.
Have a great day and keep on going sister!!!
Posted by on 01/26 at 01:00 PM
Dotcym, Barbara and Sharon, thanks for your compliments
Posted by on 01/26 at 01:03 PM
This woman is the bomb!
Posted by on 01/27 at 06:48 PM
Hi Carol A., What a process indeed to straighten. Humidity kills everything, too, so it’s just not worth it as an everyday doo. I don’t have any pics when my hair was straight and 6” silver....it was only for one year. My hair broke off a lot when I used to highlight at the hairdressers.One day when I came back from overseas my hair actually started to smoke when they put highlights in it and burned my scalp terribly. Apparently, the dye they used in the salon(overseas) before had metal in it and heated up real hot under those foils. My family would laugh everytime I told that story. It was awful, though. My hair was burned and dried and, yes, breaking. All that stuff is just awful. Actually, I always remember my hair being very unhealthy going to the stylist. Often times they pull and tug and rip at my hair!!!!! Treating my virgin hair with a lot of kindness. It’s fading to a ?rootbeer in the sun color. Let’s just say it doesn’t look too great. Gonna have to go get it shaped. My hair looks better with some layers. You’ll probably regret getting too much chopped. Time will heal your woes.......Yeah, leave it alone......................
Posted by on 01/28 at 05:38 AM
Hi Carole Anne: I cannot encourage you enough to hang in there until your hair is completely silver. It’s SO STRIKING AND LOVELY. You will end up with a mane you will be very proud of. Right now, I don’t have any pix posted, and I’m away from my home in WA State. I will be in San Diego until early March, while we are trying to sell our home in WA and move back home to SD. That said, I have to tell you I am temporarily using the library to check my e-mail. Don’t know if I can upload a picture for you, but I will try. All the best, Mari
Posted by on 01/28 at 12:35 PM
After looking at the home page and seeing Kate Moss under the “Cool Girls” page, I kept reading the posts and had to look up Kristen McMenamy as she was mentioned in a few posts. I have to say I just spent almost rest of the day looking at pictures online of Kristen and the Italian Vogue August 2009 issue. Her pictures were taken by Steven Meisel and it was a 30 page spread. OMG. I know I may be a little late in this discovery but WOW!!! What an inspiration.
I love this website for keeping me going. Thanks everyone!!!
Posted by on 02/09 at 08:29 PM
Carol Anne, your hair is gorgeous! As a fellow curly-haired girl, this is exactly what I needed to see. I’m bookmarking your page to remind me of what I’m trying to achieve.
Posted by on 02/19 at 12:16 PM
Dotty, thanks for the compliment. I am rooting for you. You may feel at times your journey may be frustrating and never ending, but believe me, it WILL be worth it in the end. I am now in my 21st month. I never expected for my journey to be so long, but I am so happy with the results. I get so many compliments now on my hair and I cherish every one.
Best of luck!!! 
Posted by on 02/21 at 07:38 PM
WOW you have BEAUTIFUL hair no matter what the color. The silver frames your face so beautifully. Fabulous!!! I hope that I look even half as good when mine is done. =-)
Posted by on 02/26 at 01:42 PM
Silvergoddess, thank you for your kind words. I am flattered.
Sorry I didn’t respond sooner. Lot’s to catch up on. I have not been able to find a picture of you. There are so many wonderful new people and it is hard to catch a glimpse of everyone. Have you posted one yet?
Posted by on 03/16 at 11:05 AM
My hair is curly, too, but I got the dye cut off about 3/4 “ every six weeks with the final cut taking the the last inch of it off. So now it’s short and curly, but your hair encourages me to let it grow-- as I wanted to do before I started letting it gray.
Posted by on 03/17 at 05:34 PM
Carol-
Love, love, love your silver curls. They look so glamorous cascading around your beautiful face. Your coloring and facial features are enhanced by the silver. Stunning!
Jade
Posted by on 04/06 at 07:56 AM
Hallrunner, thanks. Glad I help encourage you. That is what helps me too. It is great we are all here to help each other get through this.
Jadejou, I have been admiring your hair for a long time now. I also love your color and the length. I can’t wait for my hair to be as long and lovely as yours!!
Have a great week ladies.
Posted by on 04/14 at 10:08 AM
Just so you know - your story and gorgeous curly hair pix are what pushed me over the edge to commit to giving up the coloring for good! So pretty!
Posted by on 04/28 at 07:58 AM
WOW gray girl. Thanks. I’m glad I could help. You made my day!!
Posted by on 04/28 at 12:40 PM
WOW, Carol, you are stunning ... and your hair is the frosting on your cake! I love my silvery hair, but am truly envious of your lush thick curls!! I think you should explore a modeling career!!! Brenda
Posted by on 06/23 at 07:17 PM
BrandyGirl....I am truly flattered. Thank you for your compliment.
Posted by on 06/27 at 08:34 AM
Carol, you look absolutely gorgeous with your silver curls!!
You look to have very thick curly hair. I, as well, have thick curls too (see my story) but I’ve been using my Chi iron and loving the changes in the last year or so. Growing up with long curly hair and an odd name like Winona..well you can figure out the rest. LOL I cut 8” off mine at the beginning of this transition. It was very hard as I like my hair long (like you!)
Anyhow, congratulations on your progress. It looks fantastic.
Winona
Posted by on 06/27 at 04:05 PM
Winona, thanks for your compliments.
I love your hair curly and straight. Your timing couldn’t be more appropriate. I feel I am at a stand still with my hair. It doesn’t really look any different than it did a year ago. It still keeps breaking off and I trim about 1/2 inch every two months or so. I thought I would be totally done by now with my transition but I still have about 1 and a half inches in some places. (ugh, how frustrating) I am stubborn and don’t really want to do a big chop, but your hair looks similar to mine and I like yours straight. It looks so healthy. I must admit I am a little nervous about the blow dryer and also my hair turning yellow with the iron. What products do you use? Do you blow it dry first with a big round brush? How often do straighten it? Does it dry out your hair? My hair seems so dry especially on the ends. Any advice you could give would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Posted by on 06/29 at 05:17 AM
Well...since my hair is so thick and course, I rarely ever blow it dry. Only if I have to be ready in a hurry do I do that. It makes me fuzzy and look very much like a clown.
I use John Frieda’s Frizz Ease Weather Works shampoo and also JF’s Frizz Ease Smooth Start Conditioner. While it’s still wet, I use Matrix Sleek Look Light Lotion. It smooths my hair, and makes it lay much nicer. If I straighten it, I use a hair shine serum. It’s nice to have the option to make it straight if I want. For nearly 40 years, I never owned a Chi flat iron..I love that thing! If your hair is dry, do some research online about some good leave in intense conditioners that maybe you could do once a week to get it back in shape. Sometimes a salon can help with those as well. I hope this helps. Your hair looks beautiful in your photos. I know what you mean about the chop. It was very hard for me and it still took me 14 months to grow the rest out!
Posted by on 06/30 at 05:45 PM
Thanks Winona!!
I am going to try a “professional cut” and the flat iron next week. I’ll keep you posted and maybe even send in pictures finally.
Best wishes.
Posted by on 07/01 at 06:59 AM
Wow....you look beautiful! I have to admit, I tend to go through these pictures and first guess how old I think the person is with dark hair, and then with silver hair. Then I go to the story to read the actual age of the person.
With dark hair, I guessed your age at 60! (sorry!)
With the silver hair and the new softer you, 38-39!
Tells me that I likely look much older than I need to with my dark hair also. I am just starting and only have a 1 inch stripe of gray. I need to take pictures soon!
You really look beautiful. Love the curls.
Posted by on 08/08 at 09:03 PM
Carol A. ~ We’d LOVE to see an update! It’s been too long.
Posted by on 08/20 at 06:39 AM
Yes Silver Mama it has been too long. I really will have to make the time to update. I have been away on vacation and haven’t looked at the website for a couple of weeks. Soon soon soon.
dontcindyme...I am anxious to see your pictures. Best of luck to you. For me it is still a work in progress, even after more than two years. Stay strong… it will be worth it.
All my best,
Carol Anne
Posted by on 08/22 at 10:00 AM