I love this article Diana and look forward to the day my hair looks like the first picture of Storm! Did I ever say that thunder storms are my favourite weather? 

I feel MORE powerful. Definitely. I feel free from the fears of disapproval that haunted me in my younger years. I feel more confident too. For 30 years I had all sorts of hair styles and colours (long, short, curly, straight, black, brown, auburn, ginger, blonde, steaked, etc etc)but none of these had the psychological effect that going silver has had. I feel an absolute acceptance of who I am being just fine regardless of public opinion.

By the way, many years ago (10 years?) I had a dream that I was walking alongside a woman who was dressed in white and had long white hair. She was the archetypal ‘wise woman’ I suppose. She even had the name ‘Source’. I admired her calmness, her poise and felt I could learn from her but was too inhibited to speak to her. It sounds a little flakey but the dream had a massive impact on me. Maybe it was by subconscious telling me something!

Oh and that drawing of Storm is going up on my inspiration wall above my computer alongside Yasmina Rossi and Elizabeth. I think I may end up with a collage of ALL you woman on my wall.

Posted by Sharon on 09/17 at 12:29 AM

Wow—now that’s mystical, Sharon.  Maybe you should suggest “Source” to Marvel! It’s interesting, though, that you couldn’t speak to her. Now, with your new-found “powers” (confidence, self-acceptance), I bet you could. Thanks for this great confirmation of what going natural can do—both inside and outside!

Posted by Diana Jewell on 09/17 at 04:47 AM

I have been sitting here for over an hour trying to put all my thoughts into a paragragh or two...it’s not working!!!

I know in my heart that I would not be the person I am today had I not gone gray! Going gray challenged what I believed about myself! To be defined by a color???? I think NOT! I will be defined by my intergrity, self confidence, code of honor, tenacity, love of adventure and life itself! I desired to be FREE! Not bound to social perceptions and the expectations of an industry that wants us to conceal and carry! Beauty is to be enhanced not manipulated or twisted into something that is not “natural”.

Why are we so afraid as a culture to “age” gracefully and naturally?
I worry for my daughters...I worry for my sons…
I find myself wanting to delete some of this because it might come across as harsh or narrow minded...it’s not my heart to be harsh...but it is my heart to protect and save the integrity of what is true natural beauty. We live in a computerized age...nothing is as it seems. Our children think it’s real and true, but it’s smoke and mirrors. The Dove campaign put together a 3-4 min. movie on the “beauty industry” and ALL the graphics that are used to create an add. My older daughters and sons were shocked when they saw it! Are we raising a “new generation” that is media taught?

I think ALL of you women here are Super Heros! I have been teaching my children through your pictures and transformation journeys! I want them to see and experience your road to FREEDOM! I want them to travel the road now! Not decades later(like us)...now.

Whew...I’m sorry if this got too long. It obviously hits a nerve with me.
Be Blessed...Be Encouraged...You ALL are making a difference!!!

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 05:57 AM

WHEW—powerful stuff, Elizabeth. Thanks.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 09/17 at 06:37 AM

I’m not the least bit into the above mentioned Super Heroes. I’ve never enjoyed comics or these types of movies, but I must admit I am intrigued after reading about them. Of course they are beautiful, but I must say they seem to reinforce the beauty culture we are in...the look of perfection. But I won’t totally criticize them - hey! At least they gave them gray hair!

Now on to your question, ‘do you think your new superhero silver has made you more, or less, powerful?’

The answer is more powerful. I feel like I have taken the power back into my own hands. When I religiously dyed my hair, it was because I felt like I HAD to, to fit in, to be normal, to be accepted. I relinquished my power to another’s opinion of beauty and to the hair color companies’ insistent advertisements.

After taking back the power over my hair color, I awakened to the realization that I am free to be myself in other ways as well. It’s as if that one “simple” decision to take control of my hair freed me from the opinions and expectations of others.

Not to say I still don’t struggle at times with insecurities, but I am stronger, more confident, more at peace, and SO much happier.

Posted by greeneyes on 09/17 at 07:14 AM

Can I hear an AMEN????

AMEN!!!!!!!!!

Well said you beautiful greeneyed gray!

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 07:17 AM

You’re too sweet, Elizabeth. Your beautiful hair is not the only reason we love you!

Posted by greeneyes on 09/17 at 07:25 AM

Hey greeneyes—I’m with you on not being into comic book “action” heroes. But they do make a nice metaphor. As far as representing the beauty culture with their look of perfection—what do you expect?  I would bet my bottom dollar these “pin-ups” and prototypes were drawn by men, selected for the movies by men, and actually targeted to men. If silver hair is part of that fantasy, all I can say is YAY!

It’s what’s happening to all of us that’s important, here, and I love the way you expressed your new “powers” too—that one change frees you to experience so many others. It’s amazing how all this works.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 09/17 at 07:28 AM

I’m amazed how these men are fantasizing about silver haired beauties while most women are repulsed by these natural colors. So interesting. Maybe because it has been uncommon to see the beautiful shades of gray? Of course we are working to change that.

Posted by greeneyes on 09/17 at 08:40 AM

I always read men saying they don’t like high maintenance women and would rather they be more natural. Hmm, wonder what men consider natural? 

It’s funny though, I do love the x-men movies and never really thought about Storm and Rogue in connection to the color of their hair. I think it’s like my tattoos, I forget I have them and they’re no big deal to me. Same with my hair. It’s been this color for so long now I tend to forget that most women my age, especially here in SoCal, color their hair, and mine I guess, kind of stands out. Oh, well, like I’ve said, I always march to my own drummer. I think letting my hair go natural empowered me in that it helped me further accept myself for who I really am. Again, the old, what you see is what you get and if you don’t like it, that’s okay, because I like me and that’s all that matters.

This is a cool article, Diana.

Posted by sallee on 09/17 at 11:02 AM

I love the article, Diana.  I, like sallee, never noticed the silver hair!  Which goes to show you that our hair is our icing on the cake - who we are and what we do speaks louder and more clearly.
And as superwomen, who has the time to color our hair when there are people to save, crime to fight, oil to change, kids to feed and many other jobs to do!  My opinion is that’s probably why they leave it silver.
Of course, they DO seem to have lots of time to work out - otherwise they couldn’t wear those leather catsuits!

Posted by Sandy H on 09/17 at 11:43 AM

very cool.

Elizabeth & GreenEyes - both of you have hit on big topics for me. 

The pressure my children are likely to face growing up is daunting.  I want them to be aware consumers and trust themselves above the media, the beauty industry or anyone else telling them who or what they should be.  I worry for what they will inherit as teenagers and adults.  I want them to love themselves for exactly who they are.  Coloring your hair might just seem like a cosmetic thing for some, but to me it is a powerful metaphor about changing who you are to fit someone else’s (unrealistic) ideal. 

For me personally, I feel like I am in my ugly duckling phase of transformation.  I feel like an awkward teenager, slowly coming into herself.  But if I can do it now, I hope I am modeling for my children what it means to trust yourself above others.  Doing what you believe in because you know it is the right thing (for yourself) and because you can THINK for yourself - is a powerful thing.  Someone once told me that we should all make choices and live they way we hope our children will when they grow up.  That is what I am attempting to do.

Thanks for giving us the forum to discuss these things.
M

Posted by MsMika on 09/17 at 12:14 PM

btw- Sharon, you know that in Jungian dream interpretation, ALL our characters in our dreams are actually representations of part of ourselves.  YOU are the Source!

best, M

Posted by MsMika on 09/17 at 12:17 PM

Wow—all this is so heavy, it’s giving me goosebumps! I love these responses, so thoughtful, so—there’s no other word—powerful. And exactly what I would expect from our bunch of wonderful Great Grays!!

I think this will motivate a lot of people who consider themselves still in the “ugly duckling” stage of transitioning to just stick with it.  Look what comes from the whole experience. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, it isn’t just about your hair.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 09/17 at 12:34 PM

I couldn’t agree with you more Mika…

When I see advertising for new T.V. shows, inappropriate content on the net, in commercials and magazine articles. These things are being directed to a younger and younger forum! I find myself asking 2 questions~

1. where are we going?
2. what have we done?

Change will come in the “small” things...positive change will come if we fight for it! One villian at a time! Constantly being on guard asking ourselves this HUGE question..."what is motivating me...fear or peace and self-control”? If it’s fear based, 9x outa 10 it’s no good! We have taken the “common” out of sense. I’m on a mission to revive the word with my kids! One life lesson at a time

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 12:47 PM

It takes me sooooooo long to gather my thoughts and get them typed out I miss other responses

Oh the graceful Shimmering Swan that emerges!!! It will take your breath away everytime you see it! It’s why we keep coming back to see the pics, read the stories, bless the beauty that is growing out from within!

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 12:51 PM

You all need to go to iTunes & check out India Arie’s song “I am not my hair”.  It is written from both the perspective of an African American woman & that of a Breast Cancer survivor, but it is applicable to us as well.  check out a sample of the lyrics....

“Eighteen and went all natural
February two thousand and two
I went and did
What I had to do
Because it was time to change my life
To become the women that I am inside
Ninety-seven dreadlock all gone
I looked in the mirror
For the first time and saw that HEY....

I am not my hair
I am not this skin
I am not your expectations no no
I am not my hair
I ma not this skin
I am a soul that lives within....

Does the way I wear my hair make me a better person?
Does the way I wear my hair make me a better friend? Oooh
Does the way I wear my hair determine my integrity?
I am expressing my creativity..”

Posted by MsMika on 09/17 at 12:57 PM

What an AWESOME song!!!!!! Thanks Mika!

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 01:01 PM

Our new theme song? Amazing lyrics.  That, and True Colors.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 09/17 at 01:05 PM

mmmm...might have to talk to a friend about recording True Colors...we’ll see if she can be coaxed

Posted by elizabeth on 09/17 at 01:14 PM

I like that MsMika
The ‘Source’ character in my dream is actually who I aspire to be, what I think of as the best of me. Now which character represents my shadows I wonder!
sharon

Posted by Sharon on 09/17 at 02:20 PM

Mika,

Great song.  I am copying this and sending it to a friend that is scheduled for her 3rd round of chemo next and just had her head shaved so she wouldn’t have to deal with the hair falling out.  What strength we see in these women for learning it is okay to be themselves.  Thanks again, Mika - Deb B

Posted by Debbie on 09/18 at 03:16 AM

I cannot tell you how inspirational all of your words are!  I have been feeling a little silly lately focusing so much on my hair!  After all, it is just hair, right?  It’s amazing how much it can affect us as women.  I feel my ugly duckling stage coming on just like you mentioned the awkward phase, Mika.  It scares the heck out of me. 

I guess the biggest point that I take from this, is that it’s not just about the hair.  It really is something so much bigger.  It’s about being true to yourself.  Being the best that you can be and helping others the process.  I’m not much of a writer, but I do think I get it.  I’m just glad to find other people out there who get it too.  I will thrive on your words of wisdom!

Posted by grayincali on 09/18 at 09:43 AM

This discussion is fabulous.  I believe that all women are superheroes in our own right but especially those who have gotten in touch with their authentic self.  I feel that my journey to gray is assisting me with that, it started with the niggling thought that I should give up the colour and that was fueled by increasing sensitivity to the dye.  That sensitivity is not terrible yet but I am using it as an explanation to people who tell me that I look way too young to be gray.  The process of silvering is very interesting to me as the colour changes.  I have not been brave enough to cut my hair but I am too lazy to try to have a “do” that requires work.  Maybe that will come next.  It is such a treat to have this community of women who are sharing this wave of silvering.

Posted by Scorpioanne on 09/19 at 06:41 PM

Diana,
Thanks for following up on my lead for Rouge, (a super grey preemie) I love that you take us and our ideas seriously.

Super heros are all the rage in movies these days, and it seems like they can mine these stories for many years to come.

I too was never interested in the graphic novels or comic of super heros, but after living around a typical 40+ white male fan, I know enough to connect with others in the demographic at events or at work, random parties, weddings etc. I love to hear the movie reviews from my boyfriend’s view to see how the film-makers remained true to the story lines, characters and the nuances of each character’s personality or inner conflict, etc.

The other cool thing I learned is that Marvel has historically drawn their inspirations from current events (vs. pure fantasy)and does not shy from exploring content that is political or racial, much the way that music explores the undercurrents of our society, as a place to speak out against inequality or war or other heady topics.

I feel like I am becoming my own superhero(ine) because I am uncovering the authentic powerful truth of myself. It may be just hair color, but it is definitely symbolic for me of freedom, confidence, power, uniqueness, inner truth. The grey is just the tip of the iceburg...I am transforming my life on all levels.

I am not trying to be something I am not anymore and it is a fabulous and juicy life lesson! That I see that same story in Marvel’s Rouge as well as other more traditional literary characters is not surprising to me at all!

Ruth

Posted by ruthmgon on 09/20 at 01:35 AM

Wow, very meaty discussions going on here.  This is my first trip to the Super-hero forum and I love the way it has made so many dig deep within themselves and then just let it flow.  It is almost like a cleansing for the soul.  No, it most definitely is not just about our hair, it is about who we are and who we eventually want to be. 

Posted by lulubell on 09/20 at 05:21 AM

I don’t know if I actually feel more powerful, but I DO certainly feel more authentic.  The irony is that while I never received any complements on my old boring medium brown dyed hair, I CONSTANTLY receive complements on my authentic silvery mane. The real me is not only “good enough”, it’s actually better. How liberating to be free of the allergies, and as my beloved silvery-headed grandmothers used to say..."free of being a slave to your hair”. Next Wednesday is my 60th birthday, and at least I know that the years ahead will be authentic.  If authenticity and freedom are related to power, then, yes, I guess that I CAN SAY that I feel more powerful with my beautiful silvery-white hair.

Happy Graying to you all, Maria

ps My silvery hair is much thicker than my dyed hair was...an extra plus.

Posted by maria.m on 10/02 at 10:23 AM

ohh that is interesting ...i have always had thick hair and i am hoping it will be so much happier natural...i know it feels softer already...just the 2or so inches i have… i am due for a POWER cut tomorrow...let’s see how it turns out...i have yet another reunion this sat night and i honestly don’t care how wide the stripe is…
are stripes in this season??? i think plaid is and well ...i got some criss crossing going on too!!
louann

Posted by lainla3 on 10/07 at 03:25 PM

Powerful?  No, I can’t claim THAT one.  But freedom I can most definitely claim.  If freedom equals power, then woo hoo!  The power is pulsing.  I don’t fake my hair to make me appear younger than I really am.  I have 22 year old twin sons and am a single mother, so I earned every gray hair I have.  And I’ll be glad to tell anyone I earned them, too.  Ask my sons if their mom has super powers.  Betcha they’ll say yea

Posted by rocksister on 10/08 at 08:38 AM

You know the stuff that you are all discussing here is really interesting! I’ve often wondered about what is so fascinating about silver/white hair. The gray seems to look old but that silver/white, that’s seems so much...more somehow. I don’t know how to explain it. Don’t get me wrong, I really miss/like/love/enjoy/but sometimes felt “old” with my gray hair. I liked it best when it looked really silver. In fact, that’s what I would tell people, it’s silver not gray.

What do you say?

Posted by Silverhair on 10/16 at 05:28 PM

When my daughter convinced me to start coloring my hair it was because someone had referred to me as the woman with the gray hair, even though I’d never even seen my hair that way, it wasn’t really noticable at the time except for a streak on the left side, but my daughter was aghast at the thought of someone referring to me as the woman with gray hair, as she instantly heard “old” because of our concept of “gray” hair. I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I let her convince me to start coloring, as I love my natural hair sooooooooooo much better than I ever did any of the colors I had it over the 10 years I colored. There are so many shades of gray, who can really pin one of them on our hair as it seems to me, we all have a lot of different colors going on. Mine is probably 3 if not more different shades. I asked my granddaughter this morning what color she thought my hair was, she said, grandma, it’s white and I love your hair. If I have to check a box it’s always gray, but they don’t give us many choices, now do they?  I just go along with what ever anyone wants to call it. But we still see “old” when speaking of “gray” hair. We’re changing that though.

Posted by sallee on 10/17 at 08:57 AM

Im thinking that when the silver is in I might get the ends of my hair a pretty pink or black,ha maybe both??

Posted by dawn on 10/18 at 08:22 PM

Just as long as it’s not permanent, Dawn! 

Posted by Silverhair on 10/18 at 08:24 PM

I also am completely comfortable with my gray hair.  I have streaks of white along my front sides, but so much pigment has returned that I’m more dark with silver strands in the back than really silver.  I just love it!

What I also find funny is when I pull my hair straight back from my face I now have a dark streak running down the middle.  When I was coloring it and my roots would begin to show, I had a white line - my skunk line.  It has completely reversed!

I think I need to post another picture, my cut has grown out a bit and I’m feeling just so comfortable with it.  Maybe this week!

Posted by SBKaren on 10/26 at 05:20 PM

I hated the “growing out” stage and kept my hair as short as possible which was traumatic in itself because I hate short hair on myself… but I made it and now my hair is all one length (except for bangs) and a little past my shoulders.  It is ten times thicker and healthier than in all the years of coloring.  I don’t have any split ends!!  And I get so many compliments.  I always said that my hair was never my “shining glory” but I have had people cross a crowded room to tell me that they love my hair.  I was worked so hard at making my hair attractive...little did I know that I didn’t need to do anything… I am digging it.

Posted by Lynn on 11/02 at 11:00 AM

Dear SBKaren - Waiting on your new picture.  (I still need to post mine!)

Posted by grayme on 11/18 at 09:43 AM

Ahhh I took a slew of pictures last night and this morning and now I need to go through them all and pick the best of the best.  I always hate the way I look in photographs, so picking one is like torture!

Posted by SBKaren on 11/18 at 02:07 PM