Café Gray

Let’s Hear It For The Newbies!

Now that our Newbie section is gaining strength, it’s time we had a chat devoted just to them. If you’re featured as a member of our “Newbie Class ‘08,” this is your place to talk about your progress, your frustrations, your cuts, your strategy. Everybody else, this is your place to offer that great support you’re all famous for! If you’d like to be included in our Newbie section, please send your progress pictures, and a little information about yourself, to . In the meantime, you’ll find fellow transitioners at the chat “Playing the Waiting Game?” It’s a great place to swap stories about this incredible journey.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/13 at 06:41 AM

Thank you and can’t wait to see the rest of your new pics and dos.  I actually like it, takes getting used to but I am even ready to go shorter on the top and sides, I think.  Thanks for the encouragement.  Good luck to everyone else!!

Posted by karen on 04/18 at 07:29 AM

Great hair cut Karen!
Beautiful

Posted by gardenmimine on 04/18 at 10:11 AM

Hello everyone.  I’m new but have no way to post pictures.  I just turned 40 and am swearing off color.  After reading the PPD info, I wonder if this might not happen to me.  The last few times I have colored, my scalp has been extra tight, itcy, and a slight burn.  Anyway, I’m not taking any chances.  I’m not high maintenance in any other aspect of life, so why my hair?!!?

I started noticing grays at about 21 and currently have no idea how gray I am.  When I try to look at my roots, I can’t tell.  But, after reading what Diana says about it being an optical illusion, I could be barely gray or a lot.  I’m really excited to see.  My dad has gorgeous hair (I have his hair--very dark, dark brown and thick and wavy).  For this reason, I wear my hair very short.  It is too thick and wavy to do anything with if it has length on it.  Plus, I’m a short hair girl!!!  It looks very similar to my role model, Jamie Lee Curtis.  I sort of got off the subject.  My dad has gorgeous silver hair now, but in his late 30’s and early 40’s had a beautiful smoke gray with silver.  That’s what I hope for.  I also have thyroid trouble which could also contribute to the rapid aging of the hair (come to think of it, thyroid problems affect so many things).

My husband has been begging me to let the gray grow in for years.  He hates colored hair.  None of my family colors their hair, so they are very supportive as well.  The only problem is I have a young son (started late life).  The one time I had some gray roots showing, someone asked me in the local Wal-Mart if he was my grandson.  I can’t tell you how fast I rolled my cart (full of groceries, no less) back to the color section and bought a box (what a weakling).  When I color my hair, my son asks me what’s wrong with head.  When I tell him I’m coloring my hair, he so wonderfully responds, you can always color in books with me; you look really funny with your head like that.  Gotta love the honesty of a child.

I must also add to my long and rambling post that everyone, and I mean everyone, says that I’m too young to have gray hair.  Whatever.  At this point, I’m thankful to be alive and have hair.

My question is does it matter how little gray you have.  I’m so sick of coloring.

Posted by greatmom on 04/18 at 06:18 PM

Hey Greatmom - No, it doesn’t matter how little gray you have, or how much, for that matter. Everyone is unique. None of us get to pick how early we gray, or how quickly, if we truly go natural.

I am 44 and stopped coloring in December. Like you, I experienced some burning and itching after coloring. I even had a few times where my scalp peeled, reminding me of times when my part would get sunburned, yet it was all-over. At times when I am tempted to color again, the fear of baking chemicals on my scalp every 4 weeks causes me to go on with transitioning.

Since you are a short hair girl, you’re way ahead of a lot of us who are trying to keep longer hair. The shorter your hair, the quicker the transition! The average hair grows about 1/2 inch a month, so you can sort of guess-timate from that.

It’s great to have the support of your family. That will strengthen you. Plus, you will find there are a lot of great grays and great grays-in-transitioning here on this site, to encourage you on the journey. And as the rest of us have found, you’ll have no greater support than Diana.

Oh, and about what other people say, I have had some trouble with it myself. But Diana shares a concept in her book...categorizing people such as 1)strangers, 2)friends, 3)employers, 4)family, and 5)you. Then you weigh their reactions according to how important they are to you. She says everyone evaluates it differently. This has helped me realize who matters and who doesn’t.

This is getting long, but wanted to welcome you to the group of Newbies.

Posted by greeneyes on 04/18 at 07:05 PM

Hi Ladies!
This new cafe section is so exciting! Seeing everyone’s latest photos is an inspiration to all of us. I know it is a little scary posting pictures for all the world to see but it is also very empowering. We’re letting each other know we are comfortable with who we are and not just the color our hair happens to be at the moment. Lisa, your comments have been very helpful and I am looking forward to your latest photos and Judith, I just love that spectacular cut.  My latest news is that I had 5 inches cut off the other day. I go to an excellent stylist in Santa Monica, CA and she was excited regarding my decision to go gray. That says a lot for a stylist, colorist. There was no pressure to have me do anything other than having a good cut/condition but we talked about potential lowlights if I find that over the next 8 weeks I have trouble with the grow out. Patience is a virtue (one that I may not have) and I will have to see if i can wait it out or need a little help along the way. Thanks for the support!

Posted by Shara on 04/18 at 09:21 PM

Hi Greatmom—want to welcome you to the Café, too! Thanks for your story. So WISH you could send in a pic.  Maybe a friend with a digital camera?? A kid with a cel phone? Hmmmm.  In any case, you’ve given us some good visual clues. I say—follow your heart, follow your Dad’s great smoke/silver hair at 40, and follow your husband’s (and son’s) advice! The Wal-Mart lady, and those who say you are “too young” simply don’t understand your feelings, and your family heritage!

They also don’t understand about your thyroid condition. Yes, as pointed out in the book, that is one of the many contributors to graying.  I don’t say “aging” of the hair, because hair that is treated properly doesn’t weather and age. Think of moisturizing the face—it’s what we do to prevent aging. Or at least hold it off for awhile! Hair needs moisturizing, too.

But the BIGGEST thing they don’t understand is your possible PPD reaction. It sounds like you are getting ample warning signs. Please stop coloring!! You’ve heard from Greeneyes—hope you’ve also read Carol’s Story and Elizabeth’s Story.  This is nothing to fool around with! You could end up being allergic to all sorts of things. Imagine a trip to the dentist without novacaine, imagine not being able to wear fragrance, or dark clothes, or some of your favorite cosmetics.

Even if you just have a little gray—you can “let it happen” any time you choose. Sounds like you’ll feel a lot freer by doing this. And with your short hair, you’ll definitely see what you’ve got in no time. Give it a whirl. Your scalp will thank you!  Good luck, D.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/18 at 09:22 PM

rolleyes About nine weeks ago I started letting my white, yes it is silver, grow in.  After it started showing up I told my husband and he was ok with him.  He was watching a tv program on picking woman and doing a complete makeover. 
Well, of course, the hair, makeup and clothes were beatutiful.  None left the ladies with white or gray hair and compared to what they looked before they looked younger.  Now my husband says that I will look older.  One thing people don’t seem to understand is that hair dessers make a fortune coloring hair and they are the last ones that want woman go gray.  This country is so youth orientated that some wrinkles and gray hair is a no no.  I am 68, slim and I swim laps six days a week.  I do not dress like an older woman nor a teeager and I guess if you could put a bag over my head I woud look much younger.  I get my hair trimed every five weeks and my hair dresser said she would work with me.  Let me know if there is any one else in my kind of situtaton.  Thanks, Diane

Posted by Dee04 on 04/19 at 08:02 AM

Hi Diane.

I’m not in your situation, but thought I’d throw in my two cents worth. :o)

My husband is reluctant, yet supportive, so I cannot totally relate to your situation...but have a couple ideas…

Is your husband willing to see you give it a go, and THEN decide if he likes it? I wonder if he saw how you still take care of yourself, maybe he will like it.

I’ve also seen some of those make-overs where they take the gray lady and give her a great cut, and add color. What I have noticed is this...they always pick a gray lady who looks frumpy (for lack of a better word.) No offense intended, but it seems to be a woman who isn’t taking great care of herself. Many times she is wearing no make-up and her hair is a wreck - and it would be, no matter what color it was - it just happens to be gray. So sure, she looks awesome when they are finished with her. But of course they aren’t going to take a great gray and do a make-over on her. They want their make-over to be dramatic, so they take someone who really needs a pick-me-up. Okay...just my opinion.

How about showing your husband some pictures of great grays? Diana’s book and this site have plenty. Also, go have a look at this link
http://www.oprah.com/beauty/hair/hair_omag_200710_gray_101.jhtml, or how about having a look here http://www.emmylou.net/. These ladies look great.

Hope this helps!
Best wishes to you!

Posted by greeneyes on 04/19 at 01:00 PM

Diane, I’m not in your situation, because, at 40, my husband is begging me to stop coloring.  But, I feel like I agree with greeneyes on this one.  It’s like the worst looking individual (unkempt hair, no make-up, ill-fitting clothes) and voila, they make her look wonderful.  I have no problem with that, but I don’t understand the need to color hair.  What does that have to do with it????

I think showing your husband pictures of Jamie Lee Curtis (everyone knows her), Paula Deen, Heloise from Dear Heloise, and pictures of gray-haired models (I see plenty in Good Housekeeping) could actually help, along with the photos on this site.

I happen to disagree with most people.  I don’t think gray hair makes anyone look older.  I think women with platinum blonde hair (who are way too old to have it) and those women in Hollywood with wrinkled up hands but faces that are frozen actually look old (not to mention scary).  There is something to be said for looking your age or close to it anyway.  I personally don’t want my mother to have the face of a 15 year old, she’s 68!!!!!

One other note.  I work with a lady who has had white hair since she was about 30.  She is in her 50’s and has NEVER colored her hair.  She has the Posh Spice inverted bob.  When we go to lunch, it never fails that tons of people comment on her hair.  I say let your husband see that going gray does not mean “letting yourself go.”

Best of luck!!!!

Posted by greatmom on 04/19 at 02:28 PM

Diane,

I am not in your situation either but wanted to encourage you.  I agree with everyone about makeovers and looking older with platinum hair, dried skin, etc.  My suggestion (and what I did) is to go for highlights, especially around your face.  If you go really light you and especially your hustand will be able to have an idea what you will look like after your transition.  I resisted that for a while wanting to go cold turkey.  On Thurs. I had this done and got an updated cut and have received more compliments than I ever have.  Also, went to the Clinique counter today for them to let me know about updating makeup so I wouldn’t look washed out.

Also, if you try this time and don’t like it you can always change it.  When I told my nephew that I was going to let me hair grow out gray his answer was “again?” So just hang in and know that we support you.

Posted by karen on 04/19 at 02:53 PM

Welcome Diane and Greatmom.  So happy to see our circle growing! 

I so agree with your comment, Diane, about the industry supporting coloring hair.  They make an absolute fortune out of this product--think about every woman over the age of 40 colouring their hair every 4 weeks (which most have to by that age to keep the roots at bay).  What a goldmine!!  I cringe when I see those celebrity hair commercials..."Not a gray in sight!” They want to make us feel that gray is unacceptable because it keeps us insecure and using the products.  (Look at all the products for skin care and anti-aging everything--it’s the same thing). 

The whole point is that we should have a CHOICE.  We are all here at this site because we’re choosing to go gray or curious about it at the very least.  Many of us are downright fed up with being a slave to our roots.  Some of us are even getting sick (PPD) from the process.  So...we hope to have the support from others but we know there will be people who don’t agree with our choice and that’s okay.  I must sheepishly admit that when a boyfriend suggested, when I was 30, that I just go gray, I was mortified:  “Absolutely not!” was my response.  It just didn’t seem like an option then.  But this site is proof that times are changing and we do want that option, and the more of us who do it, the more great grays that will be out there showing others that it’s a viable option.

WHEW!  Enough from me! 

Have a great night ladies!

Lisa

Posted by newbie2 on 04/19 at 05:00 PM

P.S. Way to go, Shara!  Can’t wait to see the pic of your new cut.  Mine’s on the way.  Should be posted by early next week.  I really love it and feel so liberated losing a few more inches and being closer to the goal of seeing my natural colour all over!

Posted by newbie2 on 04/19 at 05:04 PM

P.P.S.  Judith, just saw your latest pic. One word:  stunning!

Posted by newbie2 on 04/19 at 05:06 PM

Judith,

I really like your new cut; you look great! Your hair looks really shiny, and healthy. I deal with wild hair myself, so I love seeing you ladies with your smooth hair!

Posted by greeneyes on 04/19 at 06:02 PM

Hi all,
I’ve been watching this chat go along very nicely, and I just want to add my 2¢ worth. Coming from the magazines, I can tell you, the more dramatic a “before” is, the better the results you get with a makeover. And adding color is such an obvious choice.  It’s a no-brainer. A much smarter thing to do (especially now) would be to show a Great Gray “before,” leave her hair alone (except for styling), and just do a fantastic makeup/wardrobe makeover. That’s what we did in the book, and that’s also what the Oprah site did—do check out that link, ladies.

Now, about that “goldmine.” It’s true, color services are the financial mainstay of every salon. But we’re a goldmine, too. Because there is so much that can go into maintaining gray hair, keeping it shining, keeping the style fresh and young, giving it proper treatments. The sooner the salons appreciate this, the better. We are all at the forefront of a very major revolution, and now two magazines for salon professionals have recommended this book. I have a feeling the smart salons are going to be willing to work with us, to give our hair what it needs, and to smile all the way to the bank.

And, Diane—you’re obviously an active, fit woman who is deciding to go gray. There’s no reason on earth why you’re going to look older. Going gray never changes who you are.  It’s simply a COLOR! It may, in fact, even go better with your skintone. It may brighten your whole face. The thinking should be—gray, in all of its wonderful variations, is right up there with blonde, brunette, and red as a viable COLOR. We’re just luckier—because we get silver, charcoal, smoke, pewter, pearl, ice, snow, crystal. . . How pretty is that?  D. cheese

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/19 at 07:02 PM

I don’t get a chance to chat too often, but just wanted to encourage the other newbies, especially Susan. I guess I am lucky that I have worn my hair very short before, so was not too daunted by the idea of cutting it as short as possible to allow the natural color to appear sooner. But I can tell you, NOone has told me I look older. Quite a few have told me I look younger, as strange as that seems. Women have been encouraging-- many envious,wishing they were “brave” enough to do the same-- and, amazingly, men seem to like the grey-- and the short hair-- as well . I doubt the grey/silver/white will make you look older! Newbie2, can’t wait to see your shorter hair!- and Judith, your new cut looks great! Keep it up. 

Jennifer

Posted by Runner on 04/20 at 08:28 PM

I think this is the week I am going to go Jamie Lee Curtis short...I just feel ready.  Tired of folks staring at the top of my head and not really listening to what I am saying...tired of feeling like people think I am too lazy to get my sorry butt to the hair salon or the drug store to buy me a box of fake color...I am hoping not to come out looking like a fat Q-tip!!  I want to spend the summer growing it out some; but keeping it modern and sassy at the same time.  Thanks again to Diana for jumping in and being so encouraging during the weak moments!

Susan

Posted by suzy2u on 04/20 at 08:45 PM

Go for it! Your grey roots look great! I don’t think you will look like a ‘fat Qtip.’ I was up in the San Francisco Bay Area this weekend-- progressive, modern area-- and saw so many women of all shapes and sizes with various shades of grey.They all Iooked stylish and sassy, more themselves without ‘fake color’ and were very inspiring. You have a whole support group here to encourage you, so if you are ready to go short-- we’re here for you! smile

Posted by Runner on 04/20 at 09:22 PM

Yay Susan!  I know what you mean about being ready.  I really enjoyed seeing a few more inches of dyed hair hit the salon floor.  I’ve still got a ways to go before the natural colour is all over, but closer feels good.  And it’s clear when you get a good cut that you are not being lazy...you’re intentionally growing your colour out.  People will “get it.” Enjoy this process--the transition will be complete before you know it.

Lisa

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 04:49 AM

Lisa,
I just saw your picture and three letters come to mind: WOW!
It emphasizes the shape of your face so beautifully.I love it!

It makes me feel like cutting some of my hair off let me tell you dear…

On a funny note, I just got an email from my hairdresser, whom I have informed of my going-gray decision and her email read like a I-will-never-see-you-again email...I laughed so hard and wrote back letting her know “Hello! Going gray doesn’t mean avoiding hairdressers grin

Good day to all!

Catherine

Posted by gardenmimine on 04/21 at 05:44 AM

Hi Catherine--thanks for the compliments! 

That’s so funny!  As Diana says in one of her posts (I think in the Antiaging for Hair blog), we can still give hairdressers lots of business.  I see my stylist regularly for cuts now and will probably opt for a clear gloss now and again once the dyed colour is all gone.  And who knows, I still may do highlights or lowlights--hard to say until I see what I’m dealing with.

Have a great day--
Lisa

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 05:58 AM

Lisa -

Love the new cut! It really accentuates your pretty eyes!

I have noticed with those of you getting shorter cuts, it really makes your eyes even more dramatic. Personally, I’m an “eyes” person, the first feature I notice in everyone, and the one I most enjoy.

I’m really a medium length hair person, but truly am loving these shorter cuts.

Posted by greeneyes on 04/21 at 05:59 AM

Thanks greeneyes!  (even your blog name testifies to your being an “eyes” person.

I am more of a medium length hair person as well. but short is fun and easy and gets me closer to “all natural” faster.  Not sure what I’ll feel like doing with my hair once it’s all one colour.  Nice to have options to play with, and sometimes you never know what you’ll like ‘til you try it.

L.

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 06:04 AM

LOL Surprise! Lisa, your hair may not be “all one color” for awhile. It may have whiter streaks, more silvery ones, deeper charcoal. That’s part of the dynamism of going gray. In a way, it’s like a child’s hair—never all one color. That’s the pure beauty of it.  So the whiter or darker areas will give you a good clue on the styling. Like you say, parting it one way and not the other to really emphasize something.

Love the comments from everybody on the salons! So many of them think we’re going to abandon them, stay home and take up knitting. NOT the reality!! If we care about our hair, and care about keeping it sharp and stylish, or want to boost the gray in some way, of course we’re going to go! Duh.

Greeneyes—I noticed the “eye” thing too. Doesn’t a shorter cut just draw all attention to the eyes? It’s amazing. Gotta go—stay tuned for more pics! D.

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/21 at 06:53 AM

Lisa! The cut is great. Doesn’t it feel terrific having more of that dyed color cut off!? Even though I am about 3 inches behind you in the graying, I felt so good at the salon last week have some of those fake red inches chopped off. To celebrate I went to Loehmann’s (they are having a hat extravaganza) and bought four hats!

Posted by Shara on 04/21 at 07:51 AM

Thanks Shara--it really does feel good to get rid of the fakey stuff. 

Enjoy the hats!  You’ll look stylish and fabulour through the roughest times.

Diana--You’re right--I keep saying “all one colour” when I really just mean “all natural.” I can see that there will be many shades of gray and yes--charcoal--wow! that’s the perfect description of my dark brown--for some time to come.  I remember my grandmother was all gray but never that white white look (which is why my mom won’t go gray:  “I’d get that horrible gray my mother went!” she says) so I may just tweak it a little when I get there. 

L.

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 07:58 AM

FabulouS, that is (I seem to make that typo often).

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 07:59 AM

That’s the thing, Lisa—tell your Mom ya never know. Both my mother and grandmother DID get that white-white hair. I thought, oh boy, that’s me. NOT. I think I have some of my Dad’s, uh, “charcoal” still hangin’ around. It really depends on both parents, in fact, your whole gene pool. So your mother—and you—may have a shot at white-white.  In the meantime, enjoy the charcoal, pewter, steel, smoke—we’re using a new vocabulary now! wink

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/21 at 08:53 AM

Hey greeneyes!  Just saw your pics--so glad you’ve joined us in the Newbie gallery!

Your cut is very nice--hope you’ll grow to like it more.  I know what you mean about the “wild whites”.  They just have a life of their own.  I think once they grow a bit longer they’ll be less trouble.  I’m trying to use some paste on mine and it helps.

Good to have you with us and hang in there!

Lisa

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 09:49 AM

Diana--come to think of it, my Dad’s mother had snow white hair, so maybe there’s hope for me yet!
L.

Posted by newbie2 on 04/21 at 09:50 AM

Welcome GreenEyes!
Now YOU are the new gray in town grin

P.S. I just received my Going gray, looking great book and I skipped work (I am self-employed) to read it all afternoon. Soooo enjoyable. Thanks a million Diana!

Catherine

Posted by gardenmimine on 04/21 at 10:34 AM

Thanks, Lisa and Catherine, for the welcome. I feel like an official newbie now. :o)

I have been working on my new cut; it’s getting a bit easier to fix. I also trimmed a bit on the sides here and there. It just seemed uneven and too long (did I just say “too long?")in places, so snip, snip, snip. :o)

Till next time…

Posted by greeneyes on 04/21 at 11:16 AM

Any more snippin’ and you’ll have to send in a new pic!  wink

Posted by Diana Jewell on 04/21 at 02:06 PM

okay ladies; I got impatient and went in and got my hair cut really short.  I don’t think I have ever had my hair this short!  Even this short; there is still color on the tips, almost looks like it’s on purpose.  Even my husband (who didn’t like it last time I grew it out!) said it doesn’t look too bad; looks frosted—I didn’t know he knew that word!!  I think it all has to do with keeping a style and taking care of myself...anyway, I sent Diana new pictures…

greeneyes, your hair looks great, love the new cut. Lisa, I think your new cut looks very young!  I think it’s awesome we are all trying to stop hiding behind fake haircolor.

Posted by suzy2u on 04/21 at 02:30 PM

Yeah, Diana, I think maybe someone should hide the scissors. I’m definitely snip-happy. :o)

Suzy2u, thanks for the encouragement. I’m looking forward to seeing your new do, along with your natural frost!:o)

Posted by greeneyes on 04/21 at 03:16 PM

Hello to all,

I decided to take the plunge and go for a buzz cut. Let’s face it, with black hair like mine, and a very visible white streak on top, I would have to cut it short at one point anyways. I must admit, the idea of shaving off (almost) my hair is quite intriguing, freeing, exciting and scary. I am just too eager to see the real me. Cannot wait no more. No, I just can’t.

My appointment is at ten tomorrow and I will be donating my hair to Locks of Love, so my hair lives on, on the head of a kid in need of a self-confidence boost. Funny how one’s self-confidence comes from another’s self-confidence leap-of-faith… (sorry for the white hair wisdom:-)

My significant other is having a hard time with my going white, especially I think because of our age difference. I am 20 years younger than he is so I guess the dating-the-young-woman-with-long-hair is over. He is himself scared of aging so me embracing it kind of puts a mirror in his face...Anyways...I will let him deal with his demons: I have my life to live! Plus, I will still be the same annoying, youthful, green eyed sweetie pie but only with short white hair.

I will definitely send pictures tomorrow and share my feelings. Such a dramatic change might have dramatic effects on me. Bye bye hair! I simply cannot wait to see my white hair!!!!!!!!!

The bold, brave and soon to be extremely-short-haired,

Catherine

Posted by gardenmimine on 04/22 at 01:49 PM

Catherine the Brave!

I think what you’re doing is tremendously courageous--even though, I know--it’s only hair, but we are all on this site because hair IS important to us. I am really excited for you because you don’t have to wait to see what nature has in store for you.  I do think it will be very freeing, along with all the other emotions you talked about.

Your partner will adjust because, you’re right, you will be yourself in every other way, even more yourself, with your natural hair. 

Bravo!
Lisa

Posted by newbie2 on 04/22 at 02:05 PM

Catherine!! Wow I can’t wait to see it!!!  I did my “buzz” yesterday and I had SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many compliments at work today!  I had someone tell me I looked 20 years YOUNGER! I didn’t go completely buzzed on the top; so there is about 3/4 inch of color on the tips; but it looks quite cool and everyone thinks I did it that way on purpose.  Send Diana pictures as soon as possible! 

In suspense!

Susan

Posted by suzy2u on 04/22 at 02:28 PM

I find it very interesting how we are much the same in wanting to see our natural hair color(s)… yet we can be very different in how we decide to transition. I felt my shorter layers were shocking; can’t imagine how it would feel to go really short. :o)

One thing is certain - no matter what path we choose, we do have one thing in common - we all still have to wait for the natural to grow. Whether we shave off all our hair, or cut off a bit of color every month, the natural still doesn’t grow out any faster. Bummer. :o)

Best wishes to you, Catherine. I think it’s great that you’re donating your hair. My daughter just had 12 inches cut off and we didn’t think of donating it until it was long gone.

Posted by greeneyes on 04/22 at 04:29 PM

Thanks Susan and GreenEyes for your support!
Susan: I cannot wait to see your picture when it is uploaded....

My partner just told me he finds short hair on woman ugly. Ugly. The word ugly is such an ugly word, it sounds gross and even the speeling is unappealing.

I feel very disoriented and yet, even more compelled to do it. If my 7 year relationship is based only on the fact I look a certain way...so be it! I am much more than hair length. His comment hits me hard. Of course, he has the right to like a certain look but I am confused. Where is the support? The white lies inherent to any relationship?…

Pictures will be posted tomorrow for sure. I haven’t raised 2 kids on my own, finished a masters degree while working full time and raising kids to have anyone decide how I will look. No way josé...you’ve got the wrong girl…

The not-backing-down,

Catherine

Posted by gardenmimine on 04/22 at 05:50 PM

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